Two Super Bowl Menus. One Lesson Learned.

I was told that since I am now a resident of New England, I am required to be a fan of the Sox, the Pats, and the Celtics.

(Celts?)

Given that the Patriots are playing in the Super Bowl this weekend, I figured I should develop a menu which proves my allegiance. Thought it should have an appropriate color scheme and use signature New England ingredients like cranberries, maple syrup, clams, and blueberries.

Here's what I came up with.

Snacky

Ranch Style Oyster Crackers

Patriotic Chips and North Shore Clam Dip

Red, White and Blue Nachos

Meaty

Spicy Cranberry Meatballs

Cranberry Glazed Bacon Jalapeno Bites

Mini Ballpark Dogs

Desserty

Blueberry, Blackberry, and Strawberry Skewers with MapleNilla Sauce

Nantucket Cranberry Pie

Believe it or not, I even considered forcing in some baked beans and brown bread, in the form of a finger sandwich.

And then I realized: No. Just No.

Issues of this great an import need to be left to the experts.

So this is what I'll be serving on Sunday:

• Buffalo Chicken Wings
• Helluva Good French Onion Dip with wavy potato chips
• Some sort of frozen bread pocket appetizer thingy that's supposed to taste like potato skins
• Red, White, and Blue Nachos (These are apparently standard enough to stay on the list.)
• Mini hot dogs in grape jelly and barbecue sauce
• Veggies and dip (as a nod to actual nutrition)

I think even Tebow would approve of the change. Hopefully he prayed for me.

What IS it About Buffalo Wings?

It's time for a snack food revolution. Something new for sports-related high holidays such as the Super Bowl.

All the food Facebook pages, blogs, etc. are talking about chicken wings, so I'm trying to break down what makes them so darned popular. Not to mention delicious.

The wings themselves are crispy, unctious, chewy, salty, spicy, and vinegary. The typical accompaniament of blue cheese sauce adds creaminess, additional saltiness, and a touch of bitter tartness. Celery contrasts everything with its palate cleansingly cool crunch.

In other words, Buffalo wings provide every flavor profile except sweet. (Some versions even add that, though I can't approve of them. Nor should they include the word "Buffalo" in their name.)

Have a look at the birthplace of these tangy treats:

You can learn more about their history at the bar's website: http://www.anchorbar.com/.

When discussing Buffalo wings, you can't not talk about hot sauce. In this case, the king of hot sauces. Frank's RedHot Sauce.

Apparently some people put the stuff on EVERYTHING.

But back to my initial premise. The combination of hot, spicy, crunchy, tart, crispy, smooth, cool and creamy is obviously a winner.

Now to come up with an alternative and start the next big Super Bowl snacking craze...

No pressure. I've got four days.